You could always just have an anonymous kink meme but assign numbers for names? That way people who are really desperate to stalk can see a number cross-reference list, or could send a PM via the mod asking if the person's willing to have their name released?

That would work out the "anonymous" issue but unfortunately I do agree that there's no way to guarantee participation on a kinkmeme. :( Course the upside to that is it can pretty much go on indefinitely as just a single post on the comm.